Assalammualaikum
bruise
bro͞oz
an injury appearing as an area of discolored skin on the body, caused by a blow or impact rupturing underlying blood vessels.
black and blue
adjective
discolored by bruising.
"a black-and-blue mark on his arm"
(of a person) covered in bruises.
adjective: black and blue
"they were both black and blue the day after the accident"
hey hey, lama tak blog, and again i would say that nobody cares dude. okay here's the deal. last paper for diploma year had just come around the corner. so, basically, im free for a while lah kan? hahaha. okay at least not for the portfolio lah dude. and here go the story. so nothing much for last year, this year. everything went well. well i think that im still cannot hold my grudge, yet im still talking to myself just because i cannot trust people.
it's just i think that id been someone that really dont care of anything. thanks disebabkan oleh mereka yang akan mendoakan aku sebagai aiman tak kisah setiap kali aku perkenalkan diri. actually, ianya sangat membantu to build my self confidence hahahah. and after trouble to problem that came, yaa, id learn how to be more careful person, tak percaya orang dengan mudah, and that basically apa yang orang buatkan, and susah nak approach orang like i used to do.
okay back to basic. degree sambung bulan 9 and In Shaa Allah jika berpeluang, ke utm skudai. all those 3 years enough to make me more like a human. how to deal with people. yeah, life, pain, make me more like a person who is really heartless. malas lah nak fikir orang yang pergi daripada hidup aku, people come and go, ya ayat biasa dengar.
well, dulu i would like to prefer the person yang pergi tinggalkan aku, adalah salah aku. hahaha wrong step, it's actually the best from Allah. When you know your value, you dont have to beg people to like you, to be your mate, to spend time with you or to love you. be confident in who your are. not everyone cant afford the LUXURY of your friendship.
to be truth, aku berterima kasih for those yang tinggalkan aku, hey not to be mean but, aku belajar how to accept it, memula tu memang susah lah, lama-lama kau juga faham apa yang jadi. there's gonna be someone or some person that appreciate you. maybe juga dep tinggaikan aku sebab salah aku, and so on lah, but Allah dah takdirkan segalanya. semuanya sudah tercatat. what doesnt kill you make you stronger, believer blah blah blah.
aku pernah rasa tamak dalam hidup, aku nak segalanya. i mean, berkawan, aku nak semua orang nampak aku, aku pun boleh buat apa yang orang lain buat, dengan menjadi orang lain. to be accept in a bunch of people. well, aku dah lalui zaman itu, dan aku memang tak nak ulangi benda tu. serious talk. aku just nak jadi diri sendiri. orang terima atau tidak bukan satu masalah bagi aku. dulu pernah lah jadi masalah aku. just i think that i should stop over reacting, over thinking. it's killing me bruh.
“People will tell you that you’re broken. Don’t believe them. They were not the person that could help you. They have not walked your path. God has got a plan to bring people into your life that have lived through a similar hell. In the end, it isn’t the number of people that are on your side. It is the people that understand what your side is that matters.”
― Shannon L. Alder
waktu tu pun, aku anggap kawan adalah segalanya, literally forget about Allah, about family, chasing someone yet there's someone always there for me. yaa that's life. and when it hit you like hell, dipergunakan, di ambil kesempatan for anything. i stop trusting people forsaken. hurt like damn. those bruise those pain taught me about life. and what i know from those life, someone said that i actually have a problem trusting people.
not to said to person yang aku balas whatsapp selalu, sorry to say but, id trouble untuk percaya orang including those person. if you're someone important to them, yes they gonna stay In Shaa Allah. if not, then Allah actually protecting you. syukur untuk segalanya. a tear or two may drop but you come to smile again if you look back it breaks your heart you start to build hope again through love. maybe not love with hooman, it's just think that Allah lead you for the better.
well aku juga benci dengan diri sendiri. it's just a courtesy of life kot. stop doing anything just to impress others. it's never a good thing. i should just name myself as Aiman Tak Kisah sebab i really need to be tak kisah for anything that gonna be encounter. the thing is, kadang aku rasa aku cepat rasa nak marah, rasa annoying with people nowadays, and sometime i feel like annoying with everything. just should remind myself that it's not me who controlling people. it's Allah's job. not mine, and i just have to focus to myself.
Don't ever give up. Believe in yourself or no one else will. My personal saying is: 'I'd rather die knowing that I tried to do what I love.' Adrienne Bailon
well nobody's perfect right? should keep on reminding self over and over again. and i should teach myself and keep on reminding that let them experience such attitude, such life. to teach them how's life going. we not gonna always at the top dude seriously, eventually we gonna hit the rock bottom in this life. that's how life work. when we really want to change ther, first you need to change yourself. im just too afraid to keep on reminding people to be good, but im still the one who doing the wrong things.
it's just i thought that it's going to be better when i know someone with a real good background. it's just my fault who keep on thinking that there's no dark past in someone life. there's always stepping stone in someone life. there's must be a reason for something that happening.hey, it's just random. so here's my thought. it's so complicated now.
Should stop thinking to be someone that who people wanna rely on.
p/s : nothing to lose actually and sorry taking time for anything above.
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