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constant reiteration

Actually I don't even know why I feel all of this, why I feel this heaviness in my chest, like everything feels not right. The urge to just go beyond the thongs that is worse, it's worsening day by day. You know that's it's there in your head  the loudness in this silence. I know there's chances but I don't feel safe at all. I'm still trying, trying my best, and I know it's so stupid because I couldn't talk to anyone, like I was asking for the attention, like whatever I feel it's just another fool need attention.  I'm sorry that actually I try to reach everyone and yet I couldn't do that, I froze myself and the voices really loud in my head, I try to be there for anyone and yet I can't even hold myself, I lost my own grip to grasp the reality and stand where I standing. I lost everything, I just look at myself broken and shattered slowly, and I couldn't even do anything, what the fuck am I sad for? Like seriously I thought I'm
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Setiap hari kubur menyeru manusia sebanyak 5 kali:
1. Aku rumah yang terpencil, maka kamu akan senang dengan selalu membaca Al-Quran.
2. Aku rumah yang gelap, maka terangilah aku dengan selalu solat malam.
3. Aku rumah penuh dengan tanah dan debu, bawalah amal soleh yang menjadi hamparan.
4. Aku rumah ular berbisa, maka bawalah amalan "بسم الله" sebagai penawar.
5. Aku rumah pertanyaan Munkar dan Nakir, maka banyaklah bacaan
"لا إلاه إلا الله محمد رسول الله", supaya kamu dapat jawab soalan mereka

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